i am grading papers

I hate grading papers. Well, not the actual reading through and dissecting content part, but the busywork part, entering grades into the computer, labeling things, boo.

I also hate the fact that recently, I've been excessively crabby, and not in the fun way. And that I feel like I haven't been able to communicate what is going on in my head. Much like my Sophomores and their attempts at a persuasive essay.

Anyway, in some strange internet wanderings, I came across an article discussing the difference between jealous and envious. It made me laugh, a little bit, because if you have spent ANY time around teenage girls, you will know that when conflict arises, at least one girl will bring up the jealousy card.

"You're jealous that I'm popular!"

"You're just jealous that I have a boyfriend and you don't!"

You're just jealous.

Sigh. Apparently, jealous is not the right word. To be jealous is to have something, and be afraid of someone taking it away. To be envious is to want something someone else has and that you don't have.


And then I started wondering about my peers, my fellow child-brides who so often seem to be proclaiming their love for their very best husbands ever, almost as if they are afraid that if they don't, their title, their identity as Wife To The Best Husband Ever will be taken away.

And then I discovered that out in the internet somewhere, there is an honest-to-goodness contest for the Best/Cutest/Insert-Word-Here Husband. And that people are entering. And voting.

Of course every one's husband is the "best." That's why you married him.

So what's the point?

When did marriage become a competition?

Are my teenage students unintentionally right? Is everyone just jealous?

In the correct sense of the word, of course.



The Boob Nazi said...

I don't know about competition in marriage.
BUT. You're jealous of me because I'm so popular. (I love Mean Girls)

Melinda said...

I hate grading papers too. It takes me forever and part of the reason is that I am distracted by the random thoughts that enter my brain as I grade. Like why there have to be words like "effect" and "affect" and does it really matter if they never know the difference? However, there, they're and their is another thing entirely.

Just sayin'.

Brooke said...

Ha! The blogger world is definitely jealous. Of many things. Not just husbands. My favorite is when people get jealous of their wards or families. Because really people ... neither is going away. You're assigned to both by either birth or boundary.

Brooke said...

I'm a nerd and I think I just typed "their" when I meant "they're." Oops.

Crazy Walker said...

Oh, thank you for this. I agree whole-heartedly. It really is exhausting trying to justify my totally awesome husband in comparison to everyone else's totally awesome husband, and it just makes my brain hurt. You're right, we all married our "best". I really get bugged when people say, "I have the best husband in the world!" To which I want to comment, "Really? Did he get a plaque somewhere, or did some governing body declare this? I'd like to see documentation..."

gurrbonzo said...

nuh-uh! MINE is best.

lorena rose said...

I don't have a husband, but mine is the best.

Sorry. I am taking this seriously. Although, like I said, I don't have a lot of experience in the husband department.

I do have a lot of experience in the jealous/envious department, though, since I only graduated a year and a half ago, and the memories of high school still haunt me.

Um, I forgot where I was going with this. In my experience, it's almost like bragging about how, "You have the best" is a way of validating yourself, by rubbing in your superiority. I've caught myself doing that. "I have the BEST *insert whatever I'm talking about here*" Then I realize that I don't care that I have the BEST, I just care that I have the BETTER than whoever I want to beat out subconsciously.

Well, it made sense in my head.

Lena said...

I really like saying "the best". So much so that it starts to loose meaning. Which is fine. So's long as you all know everything I talk about is so much better than everything else.

Julie said...

You're totally just jealous that I have the best husband in the world...

Mrs. Clark said...

Frankly, I want to throw up when I hear (or read) mushy stuff about other people's husbands/wives. Bully for you, gushy blogger, whoever you are. Hope he came with a 2-carat rock, too. Go ahead and think I've envious. Just go ahead. 'Cause I don't particularly care, and he's the one who needs to hear it from you, not me.

And Brooke, you were right the first time.

Katie said...

Yay! I word lesson.

Also, everything is a competition. The sooner you learn that the sooner you stop losing.

Until I find a real EC I just enter in all the attributes that I wrote down in my journal at 14 for best hubby ever.

Brooke said...

Bah! I promise I know the difference between "they're" and "their." It was late and I had forgotten exactly what I typed, so I second-guessed and made it worse. Sorry!

Katie--Aren't those lists so entertaining?? He totally exists. Just don't be too disappointed when you meet him and he resembles your 14-year-old crush more than anyone you might actually want to date. =) This is my favorite column ever from the DNews about some of the awesome/ridiculous things we put on those lists: