list makers.

Guys- 4.5 weeks of school left. I think I might make it. I am at the stage where I consciously force myself not to think about summer too much. I'm afraid if I think about it for more than two minutes, I will walk out of the building and never come back.

Thus, a few things I think about to occupy my mind.

1. Signs your student is raised by fascist Glen Beck worshipers: His self-starter for today talked how he wishes it was Obama instead of Osama. (Oh! What a clever joke! I haven't heard that 1,000 times in the past 2 days!) His other self-starters are all about how everyone on welfare is mooching off the government! He has a right to bear arms and shoot illegal immigrants! They are invading his property as a tax payer! Speaking of taxes.....

I sigh, roll my eyes, and hope he doesn't end up in my ward someday. Or the state legislature.

2. Vampire Diaries. There seems to be a lot of sequences when people get drunk, listen to loud music, and dance. Usually alone. Does this strike anyone else as odd? I mean, I get that drunken debauchery happens, but it will be all ACTION ACTION ACTION, and then we will pause for a five minute intermission in which one of the extremely attractive characters dances around drunk. Also, they dance so very sexily. Which, as we have previously discussed, does not bother me, but in this case it seems kind of pointless. No one is watching. All the other characters are busy trying to kill Klaus. Why try? Oh wait. No one is watching, except a bajillion TV viewers.

Aren't you glad I updated my blog today with that riveting commentary?

3. Annoyance: When you disagree with someone on a spiritual topic, and they advise you to pray about it. That is not the annoying part, the whole believing-God-still-speaks part.

The annoying part is the motive. Like they haven't considered that you might have already prayed about it and still disagree. You have issues with gender inequality in the church? I don't. Pray about it. It will go away. Also works for being gay, a democrat, and acne.

In my admittedly limited life experience, praying doesn't usually make deep issues of the spirit (or acne,) go away, but you figure out how to deal with it. I'm sure there are some miraculous exceptions.

However/Likewise, I hate it when people tell me that they USED to have issues, but prayed about it, and then those issues went away, and therefore their experience should be enough for me. I testify that my opinion on this is right. Therefore, you should not have issues anymore.

What if I prayed about it and got a different answer?

I'm sensing that I'm going to get lots of comments on what people meant when they say things like that, or that they have had issues of the spirit taken away via prayer, or analyze my wording to the point that it becomes irrelevant.

All I'm saying is that to assume that dissatisfaction in the church stems from the idea that someone just forgot to pray about it is sort of silly. It makes it seem like gospel questioners are just little kids with tummy aches. Your tummy hurts? Have you eaten something? No? Oh you silly goose, go eat some cereal and you'll feel better.

You thought you were going to get out of here without a religion lecture. HA.

I have nothing else to add here. This is where you come in.


Reuben said...

You obviously didn't pray about this post before you published it.

CaLLie.ANN said...

Oh you silly goose, go eat some cereal.

Love this post.

Stephanie said...


Ru said...

The thing I hate most about people without jobs talking about tax policy is - OH WAIT - they don't pay taxes.

I can't even tell you how many people I knew at my tax-subsidized public university (usually on federally subsidized student loans) who complained about people who don't pay taxes. It's like the assumption that you will someday make money excuses the fact that you are currently one of the moochers you're complaining about.

But this kid is even worse, because as a high school student, he's just a tax deduction.

Oh kids. They're so dumb.

Colt said...

Children are our future, unless we stop them now.

Seriously though I was the lone liberal raging against the night in Southern Utah growing up.

Mikel*Sage said...

the whole vampire diaries thing - how did I miss that? It is awkward. I haven't really noticed, because, well frankly, I've been drinking and dancing since the show started so it seemed normal to me. Aww, I'm going to notice this all the time. Also, are they going to address the whole black people = witches thing?

Mrs. Clark said...

We don't all get the same answers to prayers--and we have to get over it! I had a friend who said, "The Lord has many cookie cutters..."

meagan said...

Are you ready for this? I totally agree with you.

Okay, maybe not on the political stuff (though Glen Beck is a four-letter word to me. (I know! I conservative Happy Valleyer saying that! The surprises keep on coming!))

What I totally agree on is your prayer assessment. Though my most recent interaction with this phenomenon is not as critical? Is that the right word? as gender issues within the Church, I feel it nevertheless qualifies under your set of grievances.

And now, a rant:
Perhaps as a Mormon Child Bride you are not fully aware of the firestorm of recent counsel for YSAs in the church to "stop being single." (Oh how I wish that wasn't a direct quote from a recent meeting I attended!) Or perhaps you are aware and are breathing a sigh of relief much like my sister and her husband for "the most comfortable priesthood session ever attended". (:

Had I not been already made aware of the renewed focus on this issue due to my faithful church attendance I surely would have been quickly educated by the mountains of unsolicited advice coming my way. And the prayer concept of which you speak weighs in heavily.

Yes, obviously I want to get married one day, but today is not that day. And tomorrow isn't looking good either. And in fact, I HAVE prayed about marriage yet remain pretty much at peace with my life choices and current direction. So no, I don't think it's a productive use of my time to pray solely and specifically that my future husband will come and rescue me from my awful state of singleness. I am more than happy prayer worked for you during those 2.5 seconds you agonized after high school graduation, but don't be shocked that prayer also works for me despite the fact that I lack some sparkle on a certain finger that you're still paying off on your 5th anniversary slash 22nd birthday.
*End Rant*

So yes, annoying.

If it comes from a place of love, it's one thing. I can't fault someone for wanting me to enjoy the peace and contentment they feel in their choices. If you feel that way then obviously you'll think your way is the right way.

But when you tout your way the ONLY way, whether in self-righteousness or (what I think is more common) simple obliviousness, that's a completely different kettle of fish.

Maybe there is only one way, maybe there are more, but I think we could all take those situations with a grain of Voltaire: "I do not agree with what you have to say, but I'll defend to the death your right to say it."

geoffsn said...

Things might turn out ok for the kid. I was like that kid in middle school, and now my "ultra-conservative" family is concerned because I'm pr- *wince* ... pro- *grimace* ... progressive. As a result I must be going inactive because Elder Benson said that you can't think like I do and be a good member.

You would know that though if you prayed about it.

Stephanie said...


I feel really, really awkward right now, but I did not notice that the witches=black. Oh dear. Now I'm going to notice THAT.

Aubry and Ryan said...

Praying gets rid of acne!? Shoot! I wish you would have told me that sooner! : )

Rachel said...

Yes! (To all these things!) I really hate the answer of "pray about it", because it seems to trivialize my commitment (oh! that's right! prayer!) and also basically does everything else you said. (Not going to reiterate!) But thank you. I love reading your blog for posts like these!

Ru said...

Re Vampire Diaries - I think not all the witches can be black, since weren't the witches the ones who cursed Klaus in Eastern Europe? Just coincidentally we've only met black witches so far (which isn't really all that bad, considering most of them are related to each other - either Bonnie's family members or Luca's family members, with one random chick from Firefly down in Alabama ...)

Plus, isn't ManWitch (I kind of love saying that) on Team Klaus Hispanic or something? I wouldn't say he's black.

(Can't believe I didn't address the Vampire Diaries issues in my first comment ...)

JustMe said...

Every time you post, I am again thankful that I do not live in Utah. I think Utah is beautiful and I wouldn't mind living in southern Utah, but oh my goodness, Utah is full of Mormons!

I love being Mormon but I don't think I could stand living in Utah and being surrounded by "children of the pioneers".

Utah Mormons that move here and say far too often "well in Utah we did it this way" are annoying enough. I usually just offer them a class of sweet iced tea, and when they faint in horror, I step over them and move on.

~j. said...

I'd tell your students from #1 on your list to pray about it.

Rachel Sue said...

Gahh! There is nothing, NOTHING more condescending by ending a disagreement with the phrase, "Well, make sure you pray about it." Biggest pet peeve ever.

Hillary said...

To assume that God answers "righteous" peoples' prayers in the same way and with the same messages, and that somehow the way or message you got is better than someone else's (because you are, natch, more righteous), is the height of clueless hubris. Am I right?

MJ said...

To Meagan: what they don't tell you when you're single, and they're spouting how important it is that you Get! Married! Now! is that marriage is HARD. Even when you're married to your best friend (I waited 28 years for my man, wouldn't trade him for anything), it still sucks sometimes. I mean, really. This is ETERNITY you're talking about. Even until death, that's *still* a long time.

And kids. They don't tell you when you have kids that you'll spend every meeting trying to keep your kids occupied so they don't disturb everyone around you. I don't think I've heard or participated in a single discusssion in 3 years. Except when they start spouting the propoganda that the reason all the single people are single is they just don't care enough to get married crap.

I swear, sometimes it's hard to be LDS.

And Stephanie, you're amazing. I whole-heartedly agree with you about everything in this post. Well, except for the Vampire Diaries bit, but only because I don't watch that show. And am now glad that I don't. But thank you for turning me on to Glee. Because that show rocks my world. It's the only way I don't hear Wiggles, or Elmo, or Mickey.

And prayer is an awesome power, but not everyone gets the same answers. Haven't these people seen the Matrix?

BlueCodeRed said...

On #3, I so agree! I've decided to leave the church (due to the fact that I just don't believe it and am done pretending), anyhow so many people have said to me "you should pray about it". Um, I have. And I've researched A LOT. Another said that I should get a priesthood blessing which you know even if I did believe in it, I'm intelligent enough to know it would only work if I had faith in it, which I don't. The best is the line that I got from my [former] RS pres: "I hope you get your life in order". Yeah, that was nice. Not. I had to bite my lip to say "yeah I'm ordering my life, just away from Mormonism." Ack! Okay, rant over.

Ms. Quantz said...

A few responses.

I agree.
I love Vampire Diaries and totally agree about the awkwardness of lonely, drunk, and abnormally beautiful dancers.
I think people who tell you to pray about everything say it automatically, like a reflex. I doubt they pray as much as they appear to, or else they would be praying about what outfit to wear that day, or what frozen meal to eat for lunch. It bugs.

Alexandra said...

This was going great until you told me I couldn't *actualy* pray away the zits.

Life is good! said...

just want you to know that i really enjoy your blog, agree with several of your posts AND i enjoy listening to glen beck, sometimes. i think i will go and eat some cereal now! now go and have a great day!!!!

UK Yankee said...

I'd also like to point out that however earnest your prayer and great your faith, God will NOT make your boobs bigger.

(I seriously went through this phase in middle/high school. I thought, it's a righteous desire, I have faith, God can do it if He wants to, so I'm totally praying for a C-cup. Never worked. But I can't help thinking God thought it was funny anyway.)

Brien said...

I totally agree about the whole "pray about it" annoyance. I think what annoys me about it is twofold. First, the implied arrogance of it -
"I prayed and and am convinced I got answer X, so that is the only possible answer." Second, the assumption that prayer and a resulting emotional response outweighs the time, intellectual effort, and emotion I've put into struggling with the issue - that my thoughts matter less than your prayers.

Erin Leigh said...

You should just add "this is a freaking awesome post" button to your blog options.

k8 said...

delighted to have discovered this blog! And I so agree-if we really believe in personal revelation then why are people so freaked out if your revelation isn't the same?

jessica said...

THANK YOU for writing your blog. i'm currently in rexburg, the most mormon place ever. and it's nice to know that i'm not the only who thinks at LEAST 1/2 of what is said is insane! several weeks ago in Sunday school there was a disccusino an how more mental illness needs to be treated by a casting out of devils and not medicine. i hung my head in shame.

Bing said...

I know exactly what you're talking about. I like to turn this around and say, "When I prayed about certain parts of the Proclamation, I didn't feel the same as when I prayed about the Book of Mormon." and then I look at whoever's challenging me right in the eye and they look at me back for a moment and back down. Works every time.

ChristyLove said...

I testify both

1.) That dancing drunk happens. I had too much while cooking once and suddenly I was dancing naked.


Sort of.

2.) That you're right, praying does not make acne go away. I thought graduating from high school did might but alas, no.

I infer from this that He likes greese and debauchery.

And I'm blogosphere-stalking(TM MCB) you now, if you hadn't noticed.