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6/21/11

"this is the music I will die to"

Greetings, e-travelers.

Here is a list of things I have been thinking about as I am enjoying my summer of fununemployment.


1. Can we all agree to take a break from instagram? I'm starting to forget what the real world looks like. It doesn't look vintage? The sky doesn't look nuclear fallouty in real life? What do regular people look like? Just a break. We can resume normal activities after I remember what reality looks like.


2. My sister and I frequently buy candy together, since she shares my affinity for candy combinations that make normal people sick. Her combination of dark chocolate and knock-off sour patch kids from the dollar bin, and my black licorice coupled with Airheads caused our cashier  much concern. He told us to remember to brush our teeth, and that he no longer had an appetite. He wanted to know if we really eat it all simultaneously. We do.


3. My title today is from the out-takes of tonight's Bachelorette episode. After we are done taking breaks from instagram, can we all acknowledge that the out-takes are always much better than the actual show? Let us cut all the fake drama and strange dates and just watch a bunch of fame whores muck around the house of 6 weeks.  Or lock Bentley and Michelle M. in a porta potty together. You are welcome for the idea, Chris Harrison.

4. I think this is the first post I have ever written where I have said nothing offensive or remotely controversial. It feels boring. I'd feel bad about this, but it must mean I am enjoying my summer.

Fear not, pilgrims, I'm sure something will enrage me shortly.

20 comments:

Nookleerman said...

Hi, long time blog-stalker, but I just wanted to say how much I enjoy your blog. I do have one little problem though. I can't believe you don't like instagram. What did it ever do to you? It's such a great program, and in fact this one time it actually saved my brother's friend's cousin's dog. So, maybe you should pray and listen to the spirit before representing the church in such a negative light by bad-mouthing a life-saving website like instagram. Just sayin...

geoffsn said...

The outtake was better than the show.

The longer they drag out the drama with Bentley, the more people look at your blog. I'm still getting a good amount of traffic from people reading your comments and actually clicking on people's profiles. It's insane.

Also, I'll just say I'm amazed that you continue to read and respond to comments. Kudos.

Karen Ella said...

hahahahha! "fame whores" hahahahahaha.

Stephanie said...

@Nookleerman: You forgot to add "No offense." Now I am offended. I will stop going to church activities because I am so offended.

Seriously though, that was funny.

@Geoffsn: The reaction to Bentley is INSANE, and very accidental on my part. I feel like I wrote a blog post in a tiny petri dish, and suddenly, two weeks later PENICILLIN! Oh well.

The happiest accident is that I wrote that just as school was ending. I have inordinate amounts of time on my hands now. Glad I'm using it on my damn blog instead of writing the great American novel.

Shelby Clark said...

Funny story: Apparently you are far more controversial than I thought you were! I was telling my cousin about this fantastic, new blog I've been reading called "Mormon Child Bride." She asked me, "It's called what?!" "Mormon Child Bride," I responded. "Weird... How old is she??" was the reply. "Well, she's not really a child. She's just making a play on the fact that she got married when she was young." My cousin said, "Ohhhhh," as the light bulb in her head flipped on. I wonder how many people read your blog title and automatically assume that you are an underage bride.

Julie said...

I'm concerned. Black licorice and air heads? I'm a fan of both. But together?

Okay, I'll be honest... I'm curious.

Emilie said...

"Or lock Bentley and Michelle M. in a porta potty together."

I loved this. Laughed out loud, which then warranted an explanation to the cubicle-mate.

Michemily said...

Uh, instagram? I am too out of the loop for that one.

Candy is good as long as it's chocolate. Funny that I just said that, because I don't consider chocolate to even be candy.

mathistown said...

How amazing was that outtake?? I laughed so hard. Also, could she be more insufferable?! And dumb? And yet I can't wait to watch when Bentley comes back...

Will you please write a post about Utah's local morning shows? Specifically, Good Things Utah? Possible angles include, but are not limited to; the fact that those women set feminism back approximately 5 years every single time they open their mouths, or the people/topics they choose to feature (hideous crafts, plastic surgery FAQ, bentley), or how it's a prerequisite to appearing on the show to have a diet coke or chocolate addiction to be discussed as often as possible. Please? I'd love to hear your perspective. :)

Elaine said...

@mathistown
I quit recording GTU because I was sick of hearing how much Raegan loves buttercream frosting!!!

Stephanie said...

@mathistown and @elaine

Dudes, I'm going to have to tune in. I have a feeling this will enrage me.

Viewing party?

Jasmin said...

I love your blog. Found it while reading about Bentley. hahaha!

Angie said...

I've become obsessed with Ashley’s strange, valley girl dialect. Particularly because she's from Maine and lives in Pennsylvania, which doesn't explain why she talks like a California ditz who turns all of her "e's" into "a's." This anomaly is most noticeable when she says perfect, which she makes sound more like "per-FACT." It's also apparent in words like there/THAR, been/BAN, and I even hear it when she says Bentley/Bent-LAY. If I were into alcohol, I might just make a drinking game out of it. It’d go well with my other theoretical drinking game for The Bachelor—taking a shot every time a contestant hikes up her strapless dress during a cocktail party.

Mary said...

I love the post, but can I respond to someone's comment? Mathistown forgot to mention that everything that happens in the world has a "Utah Connection," not only on morning shows, but on the regular local news as well. "A whale was beached off the coast of San Diego. The Utah connection at 10."

Angie. said...

Just found your blog and thought I'd let you know how very much I enjoy it! Sooo good.

Jenna said...

I'm sure all the instagr.am lovers are feeling a little rage right about now.

Kidding. Hopefully?

I had to laugh about that, though. Instagram kinda bugs me. No, really. Really bugs.

HollyAnn said...

Um... "Nothing offensive or remotely controversial" - Licorice and Airheads? That's pretty offensive to me! (Or at least my taste buds..) ;-)

Trav and Lizzie said...

Yes, PA-LEASE do a GTU post. It is word vomit for an hour straight. Hate, loathe, sad to be from Utah every morning at 10...

Abby said...

I like instagram. I'm a hipster like that. I like the way that it make me feel- as if I live in Wonderland or something.

I don't watch the Bachelor/Bachelorette and don't know who Bentley is but everyone is sure hating on him/her these days.

I LOATHE Good Things Utah and I too would like you to write a post about how ridiculously stupid/pointless it is.

On a completely unrelated note, you were the big topic around blogher yesterday and that's awesome. You're basically a famous person now.

Stephanie said...

@Abby: One person's instagram Wonderland is another person's instagram nuclear fallout...

Just kidding. I like instagram too, just not ALL THE TIME.

I keep hearing stuff about blogher, and how they are talking about me, but I'm not even sure who "they" are, or what is being said. But, hurray, another excuse to be obnoxious:)