back to you

             I don't write much about Spouseman for a variety of reasons.  Mostly, I think people should be allowed to tell their own stories, and my husband tells stories differently than me.

           That said, we celebrate seven years of marriage this Saturday, and since this online place has followed so much already, I thought it fitting to include a written testament to Spouseman and the last seven years together.

            The day we were married I read a poem by e.e. cummings. The first stanza goes like this:

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)

              Seven years later and while I still feel like I carry his heart with me, I know that "whatever is done by only me is your doing," is only partially true. Seven years later and the world Earl and I married in is different.I walked away from our faith tradition, and we've worked hard to create new pathways and new worlds. There are times where he goes and I do not follow. We've learned to carry our hearts differently now.

               But, as ee. cummings says in the next stanza, "i fear no fate." That is still true. More importantly, e.e cumming's claim and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart/i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart.) is still true. Our marriage is often a wonder. Here is the deepest secret nobody knows.

              Now when I think of our marriage, I think of this poem by Rob Burton:

Back to you...

It's icy on the outside 
The fields go flashing by
Dark skeletons of tree branch
Against the darkening sky.

White fields of icy sculpture 
The grass an icing froth
Sheep huddled against the hayrick
The lakes a solid broth.

Ghostly shapes emerging
From the riming mist
Bushes sparkling brightly
Whitely blushing, frosty kissed.

Quilted horses blowing steam
Above the icy stream
Trains hot blasting
Through this winter dream.

England in the winter
A monochromatic view
From my speeding window
On the train right back to you
Back to your smile
The one that saved my life
Through snow and rain and ice
To the warm arms of my loving wife.

Wherever I've gone the last seven years, and whenever I've spent time with the the dark skeletons of tree branches and ghostly shapes, at the end of the day, I'm always back on the train.

On the train right back to you/ Back to your smile/ The one that saved my life/Through snow and rain and ice.

                                                                   (January 2007)




Drees009 said...

Earl is wonderful. You got yourself a winner.

Bryan and Sarah said...

That is so beautiful! I'm working my way through your blog from the beginning. I'm fan. I think your super cool! Thank you for sharing on this blog.